Runners and riders for the Tory Party leadership...

Fab Foodie

Veteran
Shameless lift from Marina Hyde, it's as good a starting point as any to debate who is like to win the poisoned chalice for the Tory top-spot....

Ben Wallace : Ben once fumed on Twitter that Michael Gove would be Theon Greyjoy “by the time I am finished with him”. Then again, maybe it would actually be quite popular to run on a promise to relieve the Conservative party of its penises.
Suella Braverman: Literally might as well run for leadership of Starfleet. Or Mensa.
Liz Truss: The risk is that Liz looks quite sane next to Suella, in the way that Marilyn Manson would look like a 10 next to the Demogorgon.
Rishi Sunak: Along with Javid, once described The Rise of Skywalker as a “great night out”, and therefore should be immediately disqualified on grounds of judgment. Failed to even persuade his own wife to pay him tax. Currently joint favourite, naturally.
Penny Mordaunt: The other current favourite, reinforcing the notion that the less you know about these people, the better they look.
Sajid Javid: How madly overvalued is British political commentary? Well, we elected a newspaper columnist to run the entire country, and Javid’s resignation speech was routinely described by professionals who apparently watched it as “powerful” and “devastating”, when he fluffed his big lines and was more wooden than the Commons panelling. Still: a chance to give his previous non-dom status the attention Rishi Sunak’s wife’s non-dom status deprived it of when it emerged earlier this year.
Tom Tugendhat: Will be hoping the Conservative party could learn to be as pleased with him as he frequently appears with himself.
Nadhim Zahawi: One of three secretaries of state for education to have served under Johnson this week alone, Zahawi accepted his current position of chancellor with suspicious alacrity, considering it was like being promoted to ship’s purser on the Titanic 10 minutes after the ballroom had filled with water. I can’t wait to find out more about Zahawi’s business dealings – and feel we certainly shall do.
Jeremy Hu: Sorry, I got bored before I finished typing his name. Arguably an electoral problem.
Grant Shapps: The spreadsheet king of Welwyn Hatfield, but could split his vote with one of his many aliases.
Steve Baker: Living testament to the ancient Conservative principle that they’ve always got a worse idea up their sleeve. Should wrestle with the question of how his just God can permit him.
Priti Patel: Somehow yet to realise it won’t take a wave machine to sink this boat.
 

Xipe Totec

Half man, half ant... ALL TERROR!
Since the reality is that it's a game of pick your favourite flavour of dogsh!t, fingers crossed it's the one with the best comedy potential.


View: https://youtu.be/EmYwBHooA_M
 

Mugshot

Senior Member
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:eek:
 

newfhouse

first class cockwomble

We're just normal men.
Just innocent men.
 
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